In my dream, the leak in the sprinkler line remained undetected. Water pooled until it overlapped the walk and found the seam of the wall of the house. Steadily, the pressure built, and rivulets found cracks in the foundation. The foundation began to crumble, and the house caved in on itself, victim of a liquid wrecking ball.
I stirred to stop that story. Another replaced it. There were sleeper cell terrorist attacks for thirty days straight somewhere in the U.S. The stock market fell below 100 and financial institutions evaporated. There went our retirement savings in a different sort of cave-in. How frightening!
I got up to go to the bathroom. I went back to bed and fell into a decent, dreamless sleep, the fear exorcised.
We did have a real leak in the sprinkler line. There was a sleeper cell attack. On the basis of these events, my unconscious mind took over and fanned the flames of fear. It made me wonder; of what should I be afraid, if anything at all?
Fear seems to be a default position for humankind. Biologists write about “flight or fight,” which bases the flight instinct on fear. More than a few people fear flying. Motivational speakers try to move people away from a fear of trying. Lots of people have a fear of dying.
People of a Certain Age have found ways to tamp down fears. How else have we managed to live all of these years surrounded by so many invitations to fear? Fear of failing a class, fear of unrequited love, fear of loss.
President Franklin Roosevelt proclaimed “there is nothing to fear but fear itself,” wise words that recognized the ubiquity of “nameless” fears and reminded us that we could help ourselves if we just stopped being afraid. That we have not done so, individually and as a people, stands as affirmation of Roosevelt’s wisdom.
Listening again to the Christmas story, from the time Mary learns her role to the departure of the wise men, I was struck by this: whenever angels appeared in the story, their first words were “be not afraid.”
Really? Angels?
My pastor-friend suggested that an angel is disruptive of the norm, and that one’s first reaction might be to worry about whether or not our “seeing” things was a first step toward madness.
Are you as sad as I am that our 21st century American life is so buffeted by winds of fear that seem to blow from all directions without ceasing? We People of a Certain Age played in parks and on dead-end streets a distance from our homes without adults to supervise, a joy unavailable to many children today because their parents fear molesters and other dangers. Statistically, of course, that fear is unfounded.
Citizens fear that somewhere in their area might reside a terrorist ready to unleash violence upon innocent people. Statistically, there is a greater chance of being killed by falling furniture.
Gun control supporters fear the pervasiveness of guns. Gun rights advocates fear the loss of what they see as a constitutional right.
There has been fear that Mexican immigrants were taking jobs away from workers born in the U.S. and that Mexican authorities were compliant in sending their criminals here. When a terrorist was found to have forged a passport, the object of nativist fear shifted from Mexicans to refugees from Syria and the war-torn nations of the Muslim world.
Following a tradition as old as our country, there have been aspirants for political office, and incumbents, too, who have given voice to such claims, stoking the ashes of anxiety into the flames of fear. A sure-fire way to be competitive in a political campaign for almost any office at any level is to create in the minds of voters fear about what the opponent might do or not do, be or not be.
I am afraid we are easy prey for fear. Even people of faith, those who believe in a better world in an afterlife, seem not to heed the angels of God who proclaim “fear not.”
Fortunately, there are artists, composers, poets, sculptors, authors, and the like who get beyond their individual fears, if they have any, to produce works that uplift our spirits.
Happily, there are young men and women who are still willing to bear children and raise families, actions of optimism that occur in spite of the fear.
Wondrously, there is the beauty of the earth and sky that, if we don’t pollute it or pave it over too much, will uplift our spirits to that oneness with nature where fear cannot penetrate.
Joyously, there are friends and families and friends-yet-to-be with whom we can all find community, bonds, and relationships that, at our deepest levels, we know to be the greatest gifts in our lives, and an antidote to fear.
The unconscious, the non-rational can be formidable challenges to life without fear. My caved-in house and retirement fund won’t be the last time I encounter “nameless” fear. When it happens, I hope I have sense enough to get up and go to the bathroom.
Daniel E. White
January 13, 2016